Yesterday, I really feel very imbalance...again; in yesterday S&M meeting, Mr. Horton's Secretary lead...looks like, want to rampas back from Mr. Horton's Secretary is also going to be very hard, it looks like that Mr. Horton's Secretary already have a tight leash on it...but never mind lah...Mr. Horton's Secretary can lead, I be like boss lah, add in inputs...hahaha...I feel imbalance is because in yesterday S&M meeting, Mr. Horton's Secretary lead well, highlight points that Marcus will usually will highlight lah...so got active participation from everyone...Mr. Horton's Secretary leads very happily...banyak cakap, banyak solid points...I diam aja lor...so, I feel ter-left out lor...sigh...I know...I can mencelah masuk like Mr. Horton's Secretary's style but it is simply not my style to do so...Mr. Horton's Secretary got all the attention lor...I cannot be like that leh, always feel insecure, what a struggle...what happen to my Be Still state of mind (like on Monday)...God, please fix me!
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