RULE 30: Know Yourself - Strengths & Weaknesses

If you are going to be a Rules Player, you have to be incredibly objective about yourself. A lot of people can’t do this; they can’t turn the spotlight on themselves objectively enough or brightly enough to see themselves as others see them. And it’s not just how others see us; it’s also how we see ourselves. We all carry a mental image of ourselves—what we look like and sound like, what makes us tick; how we work—but how realistic is this image? I think I work creatively and eccentrically; others think I am messy and unorganized. Which is true? Which is the reality? 

To know your strengths and weaknesses, you first have to understand your role—the way you work. I might see being creative as a strength—lots of lovely ideas, no attention to detail, generating new projects rather than seeing them through or actually working on them—surely all these are strengths? Not if I am a Completer or Implementer they’re not; then they are weaknesses. Instead, my strengths would be perseverance, diligence, stickability, predictability, conformity, steadfastness, orderliness—yuk, surely these are weaknesses? You have to know your role before you can make subjective judgments about strengths and weaknesses. 

If in doubt, make lists; that’s what I always say. Write down what you think are your strengths and weaknesses. Show this list to a close friend who you do not work with. Ask for their objective evaluation. Now show it to someone you can trust who you do work with. Is there a difference in their evaluation of how close to the truth you are? Bet there is quite a difference. This is because the special skills you bring to friendships are quite different from the ones you bring to a work relationship. 

This rule is about knowing your strengths and weaknesses; it isn’t necessarily about improving them, eliminating them, working on them, changing them in any way. What we are is what we are, and it is what we have to work with. You may well be disorganized, erratic, unpredictable—is this good or bad? It all depends on your role. You may need to change your role to suit your strengths and weaknesses better. 

A lot of people think that identifying their strengths and weaknesses means they get to lose the bad stuff and only work with the good stuff. Not true. This isn’t therapy. This is the real world. We all have weaknesses. The secret trick is learning to work with them rather than trying to be perfect, which is unrealistic and unproductive. You might be able to find better uses for your weaknesses— but then they would become strengths, wouldn’t they? Think about it.

YOU HAVE TO KNOW YOUR ROLE BEFORE YOU CAN MAKE SUBJECTIVE JUDGMENTS ABOUT STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES