Friday, January 27, 2017
Understanding the other person’s perspective
To be a true success, we must possess masterful people skills. The key to successful relationship lies solely in our ability to take the perspective of another. Perspective-taking is that all-important skill of being able to look at things from someone’s point of view other than our own. Perspective-taking brings in the mindfulness of compassion and empathy to our relationships. When these 2 qualities are present in our interactions, mutual respect, success and movement forward are guaranteed.
Think of others >> whenever we are in the presence of another, it is natural to think about what they may be thinking…if we are not self-centered. We observe them instinctively and notice subtleties such as what they are doing, where are they looking and what their body language is indicating. This helps us determine if we feel comfortable around them which helps us decide if we want to interact with them and how. If we feel comfortable around another person, we begin to think more logically, like if now is a good time to talk to them, of if they seen unavailable or busy, we can decide which is the most effective way to proceed. All of this subtle information prompts us to speak up in the conversation or to decide to hold back for a more convenient time.
Have strong emotional regulation and empathy >> if our emphatic accuracy and emotional regulation skills are strong, we will be more successful in our interactions. We possess the depth and awareness to predict the attitudes, expectations and intentions of others that may be very different from our own. This creates an interpersonal connectedness which is built to thrive and succeed because people feel heard, validated and understood on the other side of us.
Correctly reading other people >> they help us to read people. We naturally track the behaviors of others to try and determine what they are thinking, feeling, doing or planning.
Get to know people >> what you know about where people come from and how they came to be the people they are is critical in determining what to say and do.
Analyze each person’s personality >> to some extent, we all become social chameleons, making slight shifts in our behavior to fit the people and personalities around us in an effort to best relate to them. This social adaptation does not make us fake as much as it makes us well-rounded. It allows us to use many parts of our personality to create positive and effective relationships. This kind of shifting is what makes us successful with other people and more whole & successful as individuals.
Posted by yingze at 11:12 PM