Sunday, March 12, 2017

23 Ways to Love Yourself More This Year




TALK POSITIVE TO YOURSELF
Self-talk is one of the most important things we do all day. Start to be more aware of the negative things you say to yourself. Catch yourself and listen to the words. You are not going to speak to a child the way, right? So why would you do it to yourself? This is a process of an emotional awakening, that leads to more positive feelings towards you.

BE PROUD OF THE GOOD YOU DID
Spend time before bed thinking about the good things you did during the day. Give yourself credit for the good job you did. This can be anything from accomplishing a task to skipping dessert at lunch because you’re trying to cut sugar. Acknowledge the progress and be proud of it.

MAKE A DECISION TO PRACTICE SELF-CARE

Start by making a statement that I will practice self-care and start choosing activities to support that declaration. Tell yourself "I’m my own best friend" to help you make baby steps towards feeling better about yourself.

STOP WITH THE SELF-CRITICISM
You can’t stay too wrapped up in self-criticism because it will only lead to self-loathing. Spending energy self-hating is not doing anybody any good. Do something about what you did wrong, and move on. A lot of people get stuck in a state of self-hating. This can eventually lead to depression.

LOOK AT A PHOTO OF YOU AS A CHILD

It’s easier for people to connect loving, tender feelings toward a child. When they see pictures of them older, they immediately focus on negative things like wrinkles and gained weight. So find a photo of yourself as a happy kid and put it on the mirror in your bedroom or someplace where you’ll see it often.

WRITE INTENTIONS DOWN AND READ THEM BEFORE BEDTIME

The part of your brain that helps create new beliefs is activated in the middle of the night. So if you want your brain to start creating positive feelings for you, write them down and read them as you are falling sleep. If you feed it negative emotions after watching the news, for example, that’s what your brain will process, and you’ll wake up in a bad mood.

MAKE A LIST OF YOUR ACHIEVEMENTS
Visualization helps many people. We tend to forget all the good things we’ve done. List all of the goals you had set out in the past and accomplished, and put it somewhere you can see it every day. Clearly seeing things in black and white will help you convince yourself that you have many reasons to actually, sincerely, like yourself.

TREAT YOURSELF DELIBERATELY
Make a point to do something you like every day. But it has to be a deliberate act of self-love such as a nice lunch or taking a hot bath. Tell yourself - I deserve this because I’m a good person. This will eventually turn into a natural habit, leading to more positive feelings toward yourself.

STOP THINKING OF THE PAST
The past doesn’t exist anymore. Whatever you did and whatever happened will remain there. Remember that you did the best you could with the information you had at the time. The only clay we have to work with is the now. This is what creates the future. It’s a waste of energy to focus on something that cannot be changed.

ENGAGE WITH MOTIVATING PEOPLE
Go on a “diet of positivity” . Make life a workshop around how you want your life to be and engage with people who are motivating you to live it like that. Review your relationships and get rid of anything that makes you feel bad. It’s not easy to disregard family, the members of which you can’t choose, so be around inspiring people any chance you get.

PRACTICE HEALTHY NARCISSISM
People don’t realize that there is such thing as healthy narcissism. And we want them to have it. It’s a form of healthy self-investment. Brushing your teeth, eating healthy foods, wearing a coat when it’s cold outside are just a few examples. You are taking care of yourself; it’s hard to like yourself if you’re not.

DON’T JUDGE PEOPLE
Even if you’re not saying it out loud, putting people down in your mind by judging them is an exhausting exercise that only creates negative energy in the body. All of these bad feelings end up putting you in a bad mood, and it’s hard to love yourself when you’re feeling down.

FORGIVE YOURSELF
What do you hold out for. Some people don’t want to release that pain, which is usually in the form of anger, but they are only hurting themselves in the long term. You don’t have to be mad to make good choices, but you can’t process bad emotions if you’re holding on to old ones.

ASK FOR HELP
Some people, especially men, base their self-value on being able to figure out issues themselves. But we only see through our own lens and experience, and we can’t solve a problem with the same thinking that created it. It’s sad that many people will wait until a breaking point to ask for help.

DO JUMPING JACKS
When you’re angry or feeling defeated, your brain is basically in fear. It doesn’t respond to logic, only to emotions. You have to do something that is different and possibly shocking to interrupt this downward spiral. You are not going to be able to talk yourself out of that state. Scream in the shower, do jumping jacks, drive somewhere, or go for a walk – anything to get that bad energy / toxicity out of the body.

LISTEN TO CHEERFUL MUSIC

Music has the ability to change your mood in an instant. And science has proven it. Another benefit of music is that it leads to social connections, which is also an effective way to fight the winter blues. Studies show that listening to your favorite music is a great way to relieve stress. Happy tunes relax blood vessels and increase blood flow.

IMAGINE SOMEONE ELSE DID WHAT YOU DID
It’s important not to live in regret. Imagine the same situation but with someone you love as the transgressor. This kind of flipping around helps with feeling compassion toward yourself. You’d hate it if you forgot to take care of your best friend’s dog while she was away, but you won’t hate her if she forgot to do the same. So why do you think you don’t deserve the same sympathy?

BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF
This is really important and really difficult, especially if you listen to critics. But if you are not honest with yourself first, and then others, you are not giving that voice of self-love a fair chance. If you feel unworthy, you’re not going to be able to love yourself. Take the power away from that bad feeling.

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH NICE PEOPLE
Optimism is contagious. So you obviously want to have people around who always look on the bright side. But healthy relationships are all about reciprocity. Think about whether you want your child, if you have one, to be friends with a certain person.Then you can decide if he or she should be in your social circle.

KEEP MOVING
Exercise, stretch, play in the snow or just walk. Do anything that will get you moving and release the stress hormones stuck in your body. The more of the suppressed negative emotions we release, the less wired down we get.The human body was designed to move. It’s a healthy investment and an important part of taking care of yourself.

MAKE A LIST OF YOUR POSITIVE QUALITIES
Write down your best qualities and post it so you can see it. People tend to pick one bad thing about them, even if it’s minor like not being good with time, and focus on it. Don’t go down a whole self-defeating path with one or two bad qualities when you have so many positive ones. Ask close friends and family about what they like in you and let that become your truth.

DON’T LOOK FOR OTHERS’ APPROVAL
Try to understand that this is a never ending trap. You are never going to be satisfied because there are as many opinions as people out there. You are setting yourself up for misery and this is a dangerous situation from which it can be very difficult to get out, much less feel better about yourself.

VOLUNTEER
Helping others makes people feel happier, purposeful and self-confident. Volunteering is good for the body and mind. The biggest benefit is feeling connected to other people. This helps to ward off loneliness and depression.

IMAGINE THE RESULTS YOU WANT

Seeing a picture of what you want is a very powerful tool. The brain doesn’t know the difference between feeling what you’re thinking of and doing it. It’s a little bit like daydreaming but it’s shown to create the results people want. For example, post a picture of an adventure spot if you want to travel, a new house if you want to save money, or of a woman exercising if you want to lose weight. Feed the brain what it is you want it to create.

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